It was you…

​I wrote this some time ago, but it will always be one of the most honest things I have ever written. 

It was a Thursday. Not a special Thursday. Quite a bad day really, all things considered.
It was a mistake, a mishap, a regret, that put me in your way. Not in an obvious way; in the most subtle of ways that barely made me take notice.
It wasn’t ever meant to happen. Well, of course, now I see that it was absolutely meant to happen. Fate has a twisted sense of humour. But, not you, not like that, and not then.
Of course it was you. I see that clearly now. But I fought it…and I fought it hard, for as long as I could, which wasn’t really long at all.
I fell. Hard, and quickly.
Did I struggle? Absolutely.
Did I deny I felt a damn thing? You know I did.
Did I talk the talk and convince myself that it was nothing…it was fleeting…it was trouble? More than once.
But you made me smile. Even on that Thursday. And every damn day since.
You gave me that; my smile. The one you talk so fondly of. It was lost before you.
You gave me other things too.
You told me I was beautiful and you made me feel loved. You didn’t just tell me I was loved…you made me feel it.
You became my home. My safe place. My centre.
I used to talk about wanting to lose myself in someone. I never considered I might find myself in that someone too.
You were the wrong man, in the wrong place, at the wrong time…and it was perfect.
Of course it was you.
It is you.
It will always be you.
“And so, I love you because the entire universe conspired to help me find you.” – The Alchemist.


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